Polarity & The
Positive Poles Of Love
The greatest insight
of Tantra, indeed its cornerstone, is that masculine and feminine energies are
equal and opposite forces.
These attract and
complement each other, as do yang and yin, dynamic and receptive, positive and
negative.
This signifies that
when man and woman are joined in sexual union, the bio-energies of the bodies
create an ecstatic sexual experience through the interplay of opposite
polarities. And this happens without “doing” anything.
In effect, the Tantric
journey begins when we contact and re-establish our inherent male and female
polarities.
This presence of
opposing polarities or forces in man and woman is crucial, as it introduces us
to a whole new vision of the sex act.
Male and female
polarities Our sexual conditioning has sadly “clouded” this our
natural polarity, leaving man and woman out of balance with each other.
We can imagine the
bodies to be roughly likened to two magnets, which have the capacity to create
an attractive magnetic field in each other's presence.
Instead of the poles
being shiny and bright in order to respond to each other vibrantly, our poles
are smothered in rust, dust and fuzz, which interferes with the magnetic field
and flow of energy between them.
Through our
conditioning, urging us toward orgasm, it is almost as if we have disturbed the
original god-given polarity or charge in our bodies.
This cloud of
disturbance now veils and obscures the male and female polarities. In other
words, the effort and activity which we customarily pour into our lovemaking
creates a friction-style heat, almost a screen of “over-charge” (can
almost be likened to static electricity), which disturbs our genitals and the
sexual energy is thus unable to respond through polarity.
When we make love
operating against the inherent polarities of the sex organs, we are unwittingly
working against our own ecstatic sexual potential.
Through making love in
consciousness, we are able to purify (de-condition) ourselves of this energetic
disturbance, and the bodies will gradually "and gratefully!" return
to their intrinsic male and female polarities.
Man begins to feel his
true masculine qualities and woman her genuine feminine attributes.
We generally are not
aware of this falsity or disturbance in our polarities because it has been our
sad condition for so long, but what is apparent these days, is that women are
increasingly tough and manly, while a great many men in turn are more macho and
aggressive.
Both men and women are
suffering from the effects of a distressed sexual energy, we were born with
this imbalance, and from the first moment we make love, unless we are guided
differently, we are reinforcing it.
There has been so
little guidance on sex for centuries, to the extent that in asking my women
clients how much information they were given about menstruation as girls, the
answer, again and again, is none.
No information what so
ever.
Many were tossed the
appropriate paraphernalia at a certain moment, sometimes well before the event,
and that was it!
And this is a monthly
event for a woman, inextricably linked to sex and reproduction.
And no words of wisdom
and guidance imparted.
And yet, as a parent,
what do you know about sex, in truth, that you could pass on to your son or
daughter?
Most men and women have
received absolutely no information about this core aspect of their lives, their
life-blood, for centuries.
I was in the same boat,
and once I decided to re-educate myself, it took me quite some time and
commitment to regain the sensitivity I had unknowingly lost.
I had to learn how to
relax and “be here ” while making love, rather than be interested in
“doing” and going ”there” toward orgasm.
The essential step for
me was one of acknowledging my polarity and falling increasingly into it.
I focused on how to
become more “negative” and passive as it were, more allowing, more
receptive, more conscious, and when I did, it surprised me to find my man
becoming more “positive”, more dynamic, more vital, more
“here”.
This was not the same
kind of “positive” I had known formerly, where lovemaking could be
described as a pushing hard linear event, creating a peak of energy.
It was almost the
opposite, like the inverting of a peak, a bottoming out.
It was something new
and different, deeply touching, circular, ecstatic.
Unimaginably joyful.
Whenever I fell back
into my peak and release pattern, I would feel frustrated, irritable,
incomplete and no longer closer to my lover.
I slowly learned that
this new “style” of lovemaking gave my life meaning, a spiritual
quality that I had been searching for in other ways.
I felt as if I had
arrived at a restful fireside after a long time wandering in the wilderness.
I gradually discovered
that love was strengthened through an inner focus, rather than an outer focus,
and that it depended more on me, and my consciousness, than on him.
In this way suddenly
everything was back in my own hands, and I began to see that I was entirely
responsible for the quality of love in my life.
When I made love
consciously I noticed that I was much more loving and lovable.
Loving in a magnetic
field Man represents positive and woman the negative, counterparts of a single
phenomenon.
Each half alone is
useless; it is only through each other they exist, man without woman and vice
versa, is inconceivable.
However, it is
significant to understand further, that each polarity, either negative or
positive, contains its very own complimentary opposite pole.
The man while
essentially positive, also has an inner negative pole (an inner woman), and the
woman who is essentially negative, contains a balancing inner positive pole (an
inner man) too.
In this way both are
independent of each other, a unit unto themselves, each with an inner positive
or negative.
This gives each body
the potential to create and circulate energy within itself.
The male body is
carrying the positive pole in the genitals and the negative pole in the chest
and heart area.
The female, in natural
opposition, carries the positive pole in her breasts and heart, and the
negative pole in her genitals.
Between this positive
and negative a magnetic field results, and the sexual energy is enabled to
stream and spiral upward through the body.
This magnetic field
between the two opposite poles is called the “rod of
magnetism”.
When these two
“magnetic rods” are in the presence of each other a powerful magnetic
field is created between the bodies.
And when joined in full
bodied sexual union, an “electrical” circuit is completed whereby
male energy flows from the penis into the vagina and upward toward woman's
heart.
The female energy
responds by the breasts penetrating the heart of man and flowing downward to
his sex center.
A complete unit is
created and the circulating bio-electricities have the power to generate
flickering light.
With this circuit
complete the electricity passes back and forth from man to woman, with active
and passive phases, man becoming woman and woman becoming man.
It is a divine
bio-electricity which long preceded man's modern invention, and this powerful
polarity effect represents the highest potential of man and woman together, as
spiritual force, through which it is possible to penetrate the mysteries of
life.
This information about
polarities must be drawn into our lovemaking in a very practical way.
In that, since body
energy flows, not unlike electricity, from positive to negative, it is the
positive poles of the male and female bodies which need to be awakened so as to
initiate the deeper movement of sexual energy.
The importance of this
approach is signified by Tantra calling the penis and breasts the
“positive poles of love”.
They are the source of
all life, semen from man, milk from woman, and treating them as such during
foreplay and sex makes all the difference to the quality of sexual energy
generated.
Generating sexual
energy through polarity This means, in practical terms, that the breasts are
infinitely more important for the woman than her vagina.
However, our usual
approach in lovemaking and foreplay, which consists of touching and
stimulation, is to place all the emphasis on both sexual organs.
We think about getting
these two together as soon as possible, and sex usually proceeds as soon as the
man has an erection, and well before the woman is sexually awakened.
For man the penis is
his positive/dynamic pole and it is ever-ready, however for woman, this is her
passive/negative/receptive pole, which is not ever-ready.
The focus is
inadvertently being placed on the penis and the vagina, the organs of love,
when we should instead be focusing on the positive poles of love.
This approach is
extremely common, but in terms of female body electricity there is a serious
misunderstanding, and it is this ignorance lying at the source of our great
dissatisfaction in sex.
Man and woman are
tremendously frustrated (even enraged) through the inability to generate sexual
energy through polarity.
When the attention of
foreplay is given to a woman's clitoris and genital area for creating readiness
for sexual intercourse, it is energetically ineffective, even if
exciting.
She cannot become
deeply sexually aflame because her genitals are of secondary importance as far
as her inner body polarity is concerned.
To invite her
bio-electrical energy response, the positive pole, her breasts and nipples,
must be engaged, and her heart warmed.
The love and energy
built up here in the positive pole, resonates and overflows naturally,
showering warmth, receptivity and willingness into the vagina thus awakening
the passive pole.
This happens when the
breasts are involved and not before.
The organ of love
cannot be ready until the positive pole of love is included in the picture.
This true awakening of
the vagina introduces what could be loosely described as electrical potential
between the penis and vagina, when upon penetration (or at any time later)
suddenly the male energy floods into the circuit as a thrilling current of life
force.
It is a completely
different experience of sex.
When loving emphasis is
placed upon her breasts prior to penetration, the readiness for sex, both
physically and psychologically, is there.
And this is very
important.
Man will immediately
sense that woman is with him, on his side, moving in rhythmic unison.
There will be a
feeling of “oneness” with a deep bodily “yes” from her, and
he won't have to fight for his love, or she struggle to give it.
It is true sexual
union.
To make love in this
way, utilizing polarity, begins the process of establishing a powerful energy
field between and within two bodies.
Bio-electricity flowing
within this magnetic field follows a helical path, and this explains why the
movement of the famed serpent power , the kundalini energy, located at the base
of the male spine will be experienced as a forceful unfolding, jerking, rising
snake.
In complementary style,
the root of the female kundalini energy lies not in the spinal base, as
mistakenly believed, but in the breasts.
This so, because energy
cannot be raised from a negative center.
Once the breasts and
heart of a woman are fully resonant, this snake will implode, gracefully
unwinding, and giving way within.
Through the
bio-electricities, lovemaking can move to unexperienced heights, as the energy
connects and vibrates deep within the bodies and souls.
We are enabled to love
passionately, as the body electricity takes over, a sense of timelessness
pervades, each moment ecstatic and orgasmic.
Something we may have
dreamed about.
Then the delights of
lovemaking will be exponential, as there is no end to polarity, only the
possibility of more and more light.
The way to ecstatic
sexual union The art lies in creating and harnessing polarity, and so returning
to intrinsic polarities, whereby man becomes more masculine while woman becomes
more feminine.
Through being able to
truly love and satisfy a woman in sex, which represents man's deepest longing,
he begins to feel himself more grounded, mature, responsible, loving,
energetic.
A genuine male
authority and clarity arises.
Woman, in receiving
and returning this love, begins to experience herself as innocent and sweet,
the source of love and creation, and a delicate perfumed femininity arises.
Falling into balance
through this intrinsic polarity creates harmony, understanding, respect and
mutual appreciation.
Love becomes a living
reality.
Once we embrace
polarity, there develops an innate attracting quality, an organic magnetic
intelligence, between the penis and vagina, which strengthens with time.
And the amazing result
is that we require less and less effort to make love, the body does it by
itself.
Indeed, the less we
“do” and the more we “be”, the greater the experience.
The ancient Tantric
symbol, the Shivalingam, still found all over India today, depicts the penis or
the lingham, usually surrounded by the vagina, or the yoni.
These are shown in a
variety of interesting shapes and forms, but the yoni here has far deeper
implications than simply representing the negative female pole. It also
represents a channel, a highway to the heart through which the man can reach
and unite with the female positive, his counter part.
In divine sexual union,
the positive pole of male penetrates the female negative, reaches upward,
ultimately penetrating the heart.
When this happens, a
kind of golden “interlocking” effect occurs, the penis encased and
absorbed gloriously within the heart.
This is pure ecstasy!
Summary
* male and female are
attractive forces as are positive and negative
* this polarity is the
source of our sexual ecstasy
* each body carries the
opposite pole within which forms a 'magnetic rod'
* two bodies in union
create a powerful magnetic field and circulate bio-energy
* to activate the sex
energy woman's breasts must be loved and caressed ... |
